9/11 Twelve Years Later…
I just have to say that on this day in 2001 I turned on the t.v. in time to watch the 2nd tower collapse. I sat frozen in front of the television as I watched that same footage over and over and over. Every day and year since then I just can’t watch or listen to footage from the day. It is even hard for me to see pictures of the burning towers. I have wondered why I have dealt with the event of that day in this way and occasionally wonder if it is disrespectful to not want to see or hear the footage from it. I have come to believe that it is not disrespectful. We all grieve, cope, and re-build in our own ways. I have wondered why did it shake me to the core so much that I have to go into media silence every year on 9/11? It is because for me that day was a loss of innocence, for me, for our country, for it’s citizens. Being attacked on American soil is rare and had not happened in decades. As far as my husband and I can recollect from history and etc. The most recent prior to that was Pearl Harbor. When the bad guys come into your “home” as it were and bring forth such destruction and devastation it can take away all sense of security and safety and leave you feeling raw and vulnerable. Perhaps this is why I avoid the media on 9/11. I don’t want to be reminded of how raw and vulnerable I felt on that day. How for several years afterwards I would attend 4th of July, New Year’s Eve, and other big events afraid of another attack. Perhaps one that would take place on my city and my state. How when I went to Disneyland a short time later it was eerily quite and empty. The hours had been changed so that they closed earlier in the evening and how even then at my beloved home of youthfulness and gaiety I wondered if someone would attempt an attack on this place of laughter and magic. It seemed, in my mind that the most logical place to strike next would be anywhere popular and with a large crowd. I would to end by saying thank you to everyone who helped to rescue people on 9/11, thank you to the many soldiers who have gone to fight for our freedom. Thank you to Heavenly Father for protecting this country to the best of your abilities as you promised at the founding of this country. To everyone else, take some time today to reflect on your lives, are they what you want them to be? What can you do to achieve your goals and also make this world a little bit better of a place? Happy Patriot Day everyone.